Jun
27
“We are Tonight’s Entertainment!”
Filed Under Blockbusters, Comics, Movies
I’ve fallen a little behind on my blogging this week, mostly because there’s not a whole hell of a lot going on the world of entertainment worth talking about.
There’s the pre-release confusion fanboys seem to be having about this weekend’s “Wall-E,” a film with a pro-environmental message that’s completely unintentional — at least, according to the film’s oblivious director, Andrew Stanton; it’s hard to get behind a movie that the filmmaker doesn’t seem to understand himself. But I’m not going to see “Wall-E,” so I couldn’t care less about uncertain fanboys who give Pixar too much credit anyway.
“Wanted” is also dropping today. The reviews seem to be generally more kind than I’d anticipated. But this film’s jettisoned its core in favor of something more commercial. And frankly, I’m sort of over Angelina Jolie. I’d rather she take a long break from acting and instead pursue her endless campaign of adopting children from third world countries while continuously hatching a couple of her own every year or so. Seeing her play another stone-faced and excessively tattooed action goddess is not on my priorities list. She’s simply horrible in these kinds of roles, like a female Dwayne Johnson. Invincible movie action heroes haven’t been popular since parachute pants.
The only movie I got a ticket for this weekend is a movie that won’t be out for another three weeks — “The Dark Knight.” You may be somewhat familiar with this movie already. I’m not going to suggest that if you are unaware of the film, you’ve been living in a cave because that’s one of my all time least favorite cliches bandied about by sanctimonious entertainment writers. What’s more, with our current foreclosure crisis, living in caves might actually become more commonplace, and as a result, people are going to miss out on some industry buzz. But I digress.
For over a month, I’ve been on the ArcLight Cinemas website like ugly on an ape. I knew that advance tickets for “The Dark Knight” would become available sooner or later. It was just a question of when. Advance tickets became available last week at the Century Theaters, the best place to go in Los Angeles if you like annoying audiences. The midnight screening in IMAX at CityWalk is already sold out. So what took the ArcLight so long to start selling tickets? That I don’t know. But this morning, they were, they finally were.
The Dome was almost completely sold out for the 12:01 a.m. show. I like the Dome. It has a concave screen, so when you sit in the front row, it fills your peripheral vision. But the ArcLight, like at a ball game or rock concert, has reserved seating, and all the good seats were already taken. Reserved seating is the number one reason why I go to the ArcLight for mega-movie openings. I’m sick of waiting in line for an hour outside a theater to get a mediocre seat in the auditorium before being asked to move over to a slightly more mediocre seat so a couple can sit together — aww. I like knowing exactly where I’m going to sit when I get my ticket. And I know I’m going to have a reserved seat — front row, center — for the 12:15 a.m. screening in one of the ArcLight’s “black box” auditoriums; I imagine that if a plane crashes into the ArcLight and you’re in one of their black box auditoriums, you will survive.
So while most people are buying tickets for the two crummy movies opening this weekend, I’m looking ahead — three interminable weeks ahead — to watch the most anticipated movie of the summer…about a guy who lives in a cave.
-Brad Lohan
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I really think you, of all people I know, would appreciate WALL-E.
Does it contain depictions of tobacco consumption?