The “Star Trek” Footage I Didn’t See

Filed Under Movies

Recently, Paramount invited entertainment journos to watch 20 minutes of footage from the new “Star Trek” film, but for whatever reason, I was not one of them. Don’t they know who I am? I guess they don’t, which leaves me in the awkward position of basing my opinion of the footage on other people’s opinions of the footage.

I did, however, see the crap trailer that played before “Quantum of Solace.” As you may remember, I wasn’t thrilled by the images that had trickled out last month. The new trailer was a lot of sound and fury, signifying nothing, to paraphrase someone else who wasn’t invited to the Paramount screening. As far as I’m concerned, Kirk is too man-pretty, Spock looks like Rachel Maddow and the movie gives off the vibe of an unofficial “Star Wars” prequel.

Fans have debated for ages which is better, “Star Wars” or “Star Trek.” Director J.J. Abrams seems to want to split the difference, yet everything I’ve seen so far has somehow been less than the sum of its parts. I just see an overly polished turd. Regarding this press screening, the writing’s pretty much on the wall: the movie’s a stinker. Now Paramount has done a bit of damage control by wooing the geeks sites to come and look at 20 minutes of footage. What studio that believes in their movie would do this?

That being said, here’s Devin’s mixed-negative take from CHUD.com, and here’s Moriarty’s positive spin from Ain’t-It Cool.com.

My sense is if you’re a fan, like Devin, start lowering your expectations now. Moriarty, not being a Trekker, seemed to walk away from the screening somewhat impressed; coincidentally, he had reviewed J.J. Abrams’ unused draft of “Superman” with extreme prejudice a few years ago, so I was surprised that he didn’t rip the “Trek” footage to shreds. But I think when the studios roll out the red carpet for the geek site contributors, they tend to show a bit more kindness to the material, the wussies.

“Star Trek” used to be Paramount’s big thing. But each subsequent television series became less and less audience-friendly, and the film franchise went into suspended animation in ‘02 after the atrocious 10th film, “Nemesis,” underperformed. To be fair, the “Next Generation” movies simply weren’t anywhere near as good as the ones with the original crew. Not even “First Contact” holds up all that well. The Borg won’t attack you so long as you behave in a non-threatening manner? The hell?!

Based on what I’ve read and seen thus far, I don’t think this reboot is going to salvage the franchise. It might do some business, but I think it’ll be breakeven at best, not nearly enough to justify its existence. It’s really too bad. My “Star Trek” fandom is confined almost entirely to the films. That said, I can’t imagine a scenario in which would cause me to pass on this movie during its theatrical run; I’m just not wired that way. Still, I wish something would slip out of the studio that’d make me give a dump about this movie.

-Brad Lohan

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