May
2
“X-Men Origins: Wolverine” Review
Filed Under Blockbusters, Comics, Movies
So last Thursday I was on the 405, heading north to the ArcLight Sherman Oaks, where I’d pre-purchased my ticket to the 12:30 a.m. screening of “X-Men Origins: Wolverine.” I’d left a little later then I’d originally intended to, but I still had about a half an hour. Then traffic stopped dead — not mostly dead, but all dead. Cars were literally not moving in all five lanes. And I was 1.25 miles from the next exit, the Ventura exit, my exit! It occurred to me that after the debacle with MovieTickets.com last weekend, it was beginning to look like there was some external force that was trying to prevent me from seeing this film. But I made it — barely.
I think all the stupid bullshit I had to deal with in the run-up to seeing “Wolverine” simply made me appreciate the film more than the average jaded geek. It’s not “Iron Man,” but it’s not “Elektra,” either. Marvel films are basically a rorschach test of what sort of dumb, studio-mandated changes you’re willing to put up with when the material is adapted to the big screen. I liked “Daredevil,” but I hated the two “Fantastic Four” movies. All three are terribly mediocre films. I just found the mediocrity of “Daredevil” more palatable for whatever reason.
“Wolverine” gets the job done without achieving greatness. The film begins in the 1840s. An adolescent and sickly James Howlett kills a muttonchopped home invader — who he immediately learns is his biological father! — with bone claws that inexplicably sprout from between his knuckles. James and his older brother Victor promptly run away from home, grow muttonchops themselves and fight in at least four major wars over the next century or so. They both have “healing factors” that allow them to take all sorts of punishment on the battlefield and keep them youngish-looking, like however old Hugh Jackman and Liev Schreiber are now.
Despite their being Canadian, James and Victor even serve in Vietnam, but a mixup about killing civilians (Victor’s for it, James is against) has them facing down a firing squad. They don’t die, however, bringing them to the attention of Col. William Stryker (Danny Houston). Stryker offers them slots in a black-ops unit that’s made up entirely of mutants. I’d've liked to see an entire film of Wolverine and his fellow muties kicking down doors in third world — ahem, I mean “developing” — countries and raising all sorts of hell. But, James walks away from the team after a mission in Africa goes sour.
He retreats to Canada and lives a quiet life as a lumberjack. His girlfriend randomly tells him a story one night about the moon being lonely or something. This particular legend involves wolverines and plants a seed in James’ mind for a superhero-sounding name that also has some symbolic value. Stryker shows up and tries to lure him back to a life of killing the world’s nogoodniks and maybe a few innocents for good measure. When that doesn’t work, Victor comes by and kills his exposition-spouting girlfriend. This inspires James to volunteer for an experiment that Stryker’s conducting which will graft adamantium — an unbreakable metal that’s apparently from outer space! — onto his skeleton. Making him indestructible will be the only way he can kill Victor. Or, at least that’s the plan. Wolverine (nee James) immediately finds out that he’s been double-crossed by Stryker and sets off on his own to track down Victor.
In recapping the plot, it’s easy to see how disconnected and arbitrary some, if not all, of the causality is. The experience is not unlike actually reading the Wolverine comics. Sometimes you miss an issue or two; creative teams change and “shake things up” needlessly; characters go from being good to evil to slightly less evil. I think director Gavin Hood unintentionally captures the semi-coherence of the comics. Let’s see if that blurb winds up on the DVD cover!
Fans who are aggressively disappointed by this movie feel that way because they walked into the theater with chips on their shoulders. They wanted to hate it, and by gum, they did just that! Bully for them. The audience I saw “Wolverine” with ate this movie up with a spoon. The only thing that went over like a lead balloon was the post-credits scene. Interestingly enough, prints of “Wolverine” carry one of three different post-credits scenes, each revealing the fate of a different character. The tag I saw was kind of meh-worthy and had Wolverine in it.
Believe it or not, it sets up a sequel!
-Brad Lohan
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